AS A JOURNALIST, sometimes you write a piece so provocative that it triggers a strong, visceral reaction from readers. I got this reaction from a story on a chicken.

Last week’s column piece on a plucky clucker created more excitement than a fox in a hen house. The brave bird has been living in the trees and the brush along Paso Robles Road in Montclair, scratching out a living thanks to folks like Linda Lorentzen, who’s been feeding the feathered fugitive.

Lorentzen swears it’s a rooster and even calls him Brewster. “He’s been living in the oak tree every night,” she says, “and he seems to like sourdough bread crumbs.”

Meanwhile, neighbor Loralyn Perry says she’s been looking after the little guy, too. “It’s kind of cool to have one (a rooster, chicken or whatever) in the neighborhood,” she crows, adding “I’d miss him if he were gone.”

Then there’s Andy Hawkey, the hills mother who says that bird is actually her daughter’s chicken — a Golden Pencilled Hamburg. “Catalina flew the coop during a real stormy night about five weeks ago and has been living down there,” she says.

But apparently, no longer. Hawkey says her husband and two daughters were able to lure “Catty” into a little wire cage baited with corn and propped up with a stick and a string. They say she’s back in her coop, although it’s a little snug these days with the addition of eight new baby chicks.

Apparently we’ve just scratched the surface of this animal tale. Is Catalina the famous fowl that everyone’s been feeding? What about neighbors who claim they saw a bird being dropped from a white pick-up truck? And just how many Easter Eggs are hidden in the hills? Tune in next Friday for, “As the Bird Turns.”

In remembrance

In the wake of last week’s death of Crogan’s owner Bob Gattis, reader Kelly Powers shares this story about the man who helped so many in our town. She says she was collecting donations for the Corpus Christi School Walkathon when she walked into Crogan’s after their big fire in 1999.

“Bob was sitting in this charred, smoking hulk of a building, working two phone lines at a desk with a little lamp on it,” Powers recalls. “This may not be the best time to ask for a donation,” she said sheepishly. Ever patient, Gattis replied, “I promise I’ll give next year Kelly.” And he did.

Abundance of spring

Nothing beats the beauty of Yosemite National Park in spring. Watching the waterfalls, recently, I realized the awesome power of nature. Millions of gallons of melting snow were tumbling over the granite rocks — a sound that echoed off the canyon walls. The valley floor was spongy and green, with wild-flowers springing up around vernal ponds. And the Merced River was robust and full and ready for summer tourists. What a wondrous place to have so close to our own back yard.

What’s my line?

Here’s a guy with an unusual line of work. Joey Huynh teaches yoga, and not just to hills folks like you and me. He’s been to San Quentin — where he taught inmates how to de-compress with the “downward dog.”

Huynh says he was really apprehensive about going into the prison last month, because he didn’t know how he’d be received or what kind of shape the inmates were in.

“It was actually a lot of fun, and they were pretty aware of their bodies,” he says. In such a hard place, it makes sense that the inmates’ favorite pose incorporated martial arts.

And finally

The hills are alive with . . . “The Sound of Music.”

If you’re a closet yodeler or just love the soundtrack from this musical, have I got an event for you. The “Sing Along Sound of Music” is coming to Landmark’s California Theater in Berkeley tonight through April 15.

Grab your lederhosen and head for this highly imaginative interactive show where the audience sings along with the classic film (subtitles provided). If you’ve ever wanted to be in a musical, this is your chance! For tickets call 866-468-3399.

LIFE IS SO FRAGILE. One minute you’re here on this wild ride — the next minute you’re gone, often without warning. I don’t mean to be somber, I’ve just been thinking about the death of Bob Gattis, the owner of Crogan’s.

I didn’t know Bob, but I sure knew his place. I brought my wedding party to Crogan’s and had some wonderful anniversary dinners there. One night in particular, my husband and I had a window table during a rare September thunderstorm. We toasted to our good health that night as we watched a spectacular light show.

Bob Gattis is gone, and the bar and restaurant seem quiet this week. But slowly, the laughter will return. The conversation, the slaps on the back and the clinking of glasses in a place where “everybody knows your name.”

Crogan’s isn’t just a Montclair institution — it’s a tribute to a man who knew how to live.

Stealing mail

The Bay Area is a lot of things to a lot of people. But to mail thieves, it’s easy pickings.

“The only place in the nation where mail theft occurs more frequently than here is Phoenix, Arizona,” says hills Postal Inspector Ryan McAlhaney, who has been keeping an eye on the growing mail theft problem in our own neighborhoods.

Luckily, it’s a crime that’s easily prevented — with a simple device called a locked mailbox. Not the cheap ones you see in some chain stores, but a good, sturdy lock box with a deep well to hold the mail.

Thanks to the Montclair Safety and Improvement Council, specially discounted models are on display in front of California Savings Bank at 1998 Mountain Blvd. Additional signs with photos of the boxes, order forms and literature are at J&J Hardware at 1962 Mountain; Montclair Hardware at 2011 Mountain, Keyosk/Golden State Locksmith at 6206 La Salle Ave., and at both the Montclair and Piedmont Avenue post offices.

You can also order a box online at http://www.montclairsic.org.

Speaking of mailboxes

Lorraine Adams, a 50-year resident of Montclair, says she’s so excited about the new drive-by mailbox on Mountain at Colton. But like others, she’s worried that there hasn’t been enough notice to potential customers.

That may change soon. Word has it the Postal Service may help pay for a flier with tips on preventing mail theft and a map to the new drop box site.

Chicken riddle

Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because it didn’t have a choice — after being dumped on Paso Robles Drive in Montclair.

Hills neighbors report that somebody in a white pickup truck dropped a Road Island Red in the road a couple of weeks ago, then took off. If you see this “free range chicken,” give me a call so we can find it a good home.

Speaking of animals

An Oakland policeman helped out a hills native the other day. It was a disoriented deer, obviously in shock from some kind of trauma.

The officer had a makeshift leash on the animal’s neck and was standing alongside Shepherd Canyon Road, patiently waiting for help.

Meanwhile, reader Steve Harris says he’s been seeing an animal of a different kind on his hikes in Marin County. On at least two occasions, he has spotted bobcats.

USE IT OR LOSE IT! I get a chuckle out of that old saying, but this time it’s personal. This time, it’s directed at us.

I’m talking about the banner in front of our new drive-by mailbox at Mountain and Colton, put up recently by Jim Clardy of the Montclair Safety and Improvement Council’s mail theft task team.

It took resident Chuck Harrison 10 years to get the mailbox installed, and there are already rumblings that it might be removed. Why? The U.S. Postal Service needs to see action there, or it can’t justify the expense to operate the site.

Harrison is livid. He says he asked the postmaster for the USPS to aggressively advertise the new box. But other than the articles in the Montclarion, there’s been little out there to tell folks the box is in, and that it’s a drive-by “snorkel box.”

That means you can lean out your window and drop off your mail, never having to leave your car. It means you don’t have to double park in front of the post office on Mountain anymore. It means convenience. But it doesn’t mean forever.

Use it or lose it. Take the sign seriously, and start taking your mail there soon. Or you may find that the little blue box that took so much effort and community spirit, will be marked “return to sender.”

Ditto for another new box that’s gone up at Scout and Mountain.

Mail bag

Thanks to Paula Stetler for her nice note regarding my piece on the Hillside Gardeners of Montclair. She wants everyone to come to their garden tour on Sunday, May 2 — featuring six incredible hills gardens. Twenty dollars a ticket is a small price to pay for good gardening ideas, and the money helps the club plant trees and flowers all over our East Bay neighborhoods. Call 510-339-8720 and 510-530-4855.

E-mail bag

As schools grapple with big budget cuts, reader J. Hall says she’s questioning the presence of Pepsi on one East Bay middle school campus. “They gave my son’s school a $32,000 exclusive contract bonus. In return, they moved 20 vending machines onto the campus.” She guesses that’s more vending machines than you’ll find at Moscone Center, but says booster groups love the extra money, even at the expense of the health of the entire student body.

By a nose

It’s race time again at Golden Gate Fields. The turf is flying as the horses and jockeys make their way around the beautifully groomed track.

Whether you bet or not, it’s fun to watch the animals before the race. Look them in the eye, sense their anticipation, and see if you can guess which one has the makings of a champion.

Local horse whisperer Steve Haines once told me that horses are the most honest of all living beings. More than a few races could be won if you could read the steed’s signals.

A “cat-astrophi”

I’ve heard of fat cats, but never a fur ball that could crack your ribs.

Glenview Key and Lock’s Dawn Schwartz says she was resting on her bed when her cat came flying off the headboard and landed squarely on her rib cage. “It was a freak accident,” she says, adding that kitty was only answering her “cat” calls. By the way, the 16-pound bruiser is aptly named … Hercules.

Word games

How influential are American movie stars? Oakland travel writer Dennis Cavagnaro says he was in Manila recently, and saw a bakery named: Marlon Brandough.

THIS IS the story of four Oaklanders on an odyssey — an elephant odyssey.

It all started when Howletts Animal Park, near London, offered to donate a young bull elephant to the Oakland Zoo.

“We lost our bull elephant, Smokey, over two years ago and had been searching for a replacement,” says Dr. Joel Parrott. (Yes, he’s a bird doctor and also the director of the Oakland Zoo).

Howletts is way out in the countryside, and “Doc” sent his general curator, Colleen Kinzley, to England a week ahead of him to work with the elephant. Her job: to train the “big guy” to get into a crate.

Apparently she succeeded. “When it came time to load the elephant up,” Doc says, “he was very cooperative.” The beast lumbered into the crate and was lifted by crane onto a truck, which traveled across the English Channel by ferry.

The next stop was the airport in Amsterdam, where Dr. Parrott and his crew spent the night, with Osh the elephant, in an animal hotel. KLM airlines ships so many animals overseas, that the company actually has a hotel for them near the airport.

“It was like sleeping in a heated garage bay,” Parrott recalls. Of course, he didn’t get much shut-eye — what with the elephant taking most of the covers (just jokin’). But Doc and the others did find themselves up most of the night keeping Osh company.

The next day, they loaded Osh onto a modified 747 cargo plane with the back third of the seats removed — for jumbo-sized passengers. The captain made an announcement that went something like this: “We’ve got a special guest today — a full grown African Elephant in the back of the cargo hold.” None of the passengers opted to get off, though a similar flight with a rhino caused a mini exodus.

So Osh flew, first class, all the way to Los Angeles. And for just $19,000, you might say he flew for peanuts.

But why not go straight into San Francisco? Was this a liberal conspiracy to keep all Republican symbols out of the Bay Area? Not exactly.

“There are only four U.S. ports of entry for animals,” says Parrott, who added that Osh had to go through myriad government agencies at LAX, including customs.

Through rush-hour traffic, the intrepid travelers made it to Oakland and Osh’s new home in the hills.

Rest up, big guy. In a few years when you’re old enough to date, there are three female elephants waiting for you. Waiting to continue one of the most important elephant breeding programs in North America.

It’s all happening at our zoo.

It takes a village

One thing I love about the hills is the “can do” spirit of the folks who live here — folks like Wendy Jones and Carolynn Aikawa. Together, they found the volunteers and the funding to build a new playground at Joaquin Miller Park.

The remarkable thing is that Wendy doesn’t even have kids. But her husband was a San Francisco cop for 20 years, and Wendy says she knows she can make her little piece of the world better.

“Every time I drive down the hill and see all the kids on the playground, it fills my heart with joy,” she says.

Thanks, Wendy. You and Carolyn had a dream and followed through on it. And Oakland is a better place because of it.

E-mail bag

My column on door-to-door magazine salespeople prompted a heart-rendering e-mail from a nonprofit organization that tracks criminal activity in this industry. Reader Phil Ellenbecker says the problem runs much deeper than what I was able to cover two weeks ago. He urges readers who’ve had contact with door-to-door sales people to check his group’s Web sites: http://www.travelingsalescrews.info and http://www.dedicatedmemorial.org.

After Oakland police linked a traveling magazine group to a rash of burglaries in the hills, this may be vital information for all of us.

What’s in a name?

A lot, especially when you get the name wrong, as I did last week in a follow-up piece on former lighthouse keeper Walter Fanning.

Luckily, his daughter, Sue, set me right with this e-mail: “Loved your column last Friday. It was the best I’ve seen about East Brother Light Station, but somehow, between last Friday and this Friday my father’s name was changed from “Walter Fanning” to “Howard Fanning.” My whole life I have known him as “Walter.” Do you know something I don’t?”

WHAT DO YOU GET when you cross a dental exam with a massage? Open wide and say “ahhhh” to a new concept called Spa Dentistry in Oakland.

Located in the stunning Rotunda building in downtown Oakland, City Center Dental offers all the latest dental care with a focus on comfort. What a concept!

Instead of sterile white walls, you get sage, fresh flowers and aroma therapy. Instead of a lecture on sweets, you get fresh Otis Spunkmeyer cookies in the reception room.

“It’s comfort food,” says Judy Travis, the founder of Spa Dentistry (who adds that you can always spit and rinse).

And who likes a little herbal tea and a massage with their root canal? Big, macho guys like players on the Golden State Warriors and the Oakland A’s. But you don’t have to be an athlete to get pampered here. There are plenty of eye masks and neck warmers to go around. For details, call 510-763-6300.

Helping kids

If you have room in your heart and your home this summer, keep reading.

A great organization call Kidsave is hosting a free party from 7:30 to 10:30 p.m. Saturday at Oakland’s Leona Lodge. The party features live music from the Oakland Youth Orchestra, Kharma Dogs and other local musicians, as well as food, drink and prizes.

Kidsave finds homes in the United States for abandoned children from countries like Russia, Kazakstan and Colombia. The idea is to “host” a child for the summer and see how he or she fits with your family.

Several readers have told me they went on to adopt the visiting children. To learn more about Kidsave, call 510-339-2237.

Lighthouse memories

Two readers have stories to share, after reading last week’s column on East Brother Light station.

Mary Feinberg writes, “We attended a wedding out there for a friend many years ago and to top off the great food and fun, the happy couple got picked up by a helicopter. The rest of us had to take the little boat back to the mainland.”

My article also brought back memories for the folks at Standard Saw Works Inc., an Oakland business that’s been around for 86 years. Owner Gloria Hartshorn says 94-year-old Walter Fanning (who was instrumental in saving the lighthouse) used to get his tools sharpened there for work he did at East Brother. “He was a gentle man and a pleasure to talk to,” she remembers. Reading about Howard in my column last week has led to a reunion for Hartshorn and Fanning, who haven’t seen each other in many years.

Then there’s trash

Who would dump a crummy stained couch, without the cushions, along a residential road in the hills? Somebody with no scruples, no morals and no taste in furniture.

That being said, if you’re tired of seeing trash and garbage in our canyons and around the village, the Montclair Safety and Improvement Council wants you. The group’s March 18 meeting tackles litter and blight, and how to prevent these problems. It starts at 7 p.m. at the Montclair Elementary School auditorium. For details, see http://www.montclairsic.org.

E-mail bag

Liz T. writes: “What happened to the Montclair Pet Shop?” She says you could buy everything from dog food to chicken feed and goat grub at that store, which just recently went out of business. Word has it that business just wasn’t the same for Montclair Pet Shop after their block was redone to accommodate the big new Luckys Store (now Albertsons). Having Pet Food Express at the other end of town didn’t help either.

Punny plate

Spotted on a black sports car in Oakland, the vanity plates “2 SWHEAT.” Reader K. Jordan says the plate’s frame had an added message for bumper lovers that read: “I know I’m cute but get off my a–.”

KINDNESS AND trust — these are qualities we all like to have. But wherever you find this goodness, you also find folks eager to take advantage of it. I’m talking about certain scam artists posing as door-to-door magazine sellers in the hills.

Last week, Oakland police arrested two of these solicitors on outstanding warrants. In each case, the suspects were going door to door, claiming they were representing a magazine sales company. Whether they were or not is still being investigated.

But Officer Mike Sivila says the suspects badgered an elderly man on Grandview Drive. “The homeowner had a very secluded home, and two guys walked down his long driveway and knocked on his door. When the homeowner answered, he did it with one hand behind his back. One of the two guys asked, “Do you have a gun?” The elderly man said “yes,” and the two guys responded, “So do we.” The man was able to shut his door and call police.

Selling magazines door to door isn’t illegal — if you have the right permits. But police say that, in most cases, solicitors you see in the hills don’t have permits. They get dropped off each day by rental van drivers, who come back hours later to pick them up.

Some of these supposed solicitors “are definitely up to no good,” Officer Sivila says. “We’ve found a number of burglaries in the wake of their visits.”

So what do we do? For starters, we don’t open our door to anyone we don’t recognize. It may feel like the country up here, but we live in a big city with big-city crime.

Second, call 911 if you feel threatened and the nonemergency number (510-777-3333) if you don’t. Either way, call, because police say they want to find these guys and check out each one’s credentials.

Third, if you do encounter a magazine salesperson, don’t give them cash or a check. Police say the money is almost always pocketed by the solicitor, and the customer never sees the magazines.

And last, support activities and programs that encourage teens and young adults to be the best they can be, such as the Coaches Against Gun Violence campaign recently launched at some Oakland public schools.

The perfect pair

If a glass of wine is good for you, imagine what a winemaker dinner can do for your health. The Claremont Resort and Spa has partnered with six local vintners to offer wine dinners each month through June.

Last week’s event featured the wonderful wines of Nicholson Ranch in Sonoma County. An award-winning chardonnay complimented the first course — a chilled tiger prawn salad. An earthy pinot noir paired perfectly with the black truffle gnocchi. With every offering, the grape grower and the winemaker shared their thoughts and opened our minds to new culinary delights.

All this, as we watched the sun set over our beautiful bay. Information on the winemaker series can be found at http://www.claremontresort.com.

Daddy’s little girl

With all the mixed-up news these days, it’s nice to celebrate something old-fashioned. Last weekend’s father-daughter dance was a magical time at the Oakland Hills Tennis Club.

The event is a fund-raiser for Corpus Christi School and a big night for little girls, who get all dressed up and even buy their dads boutonnieres. Of course, the fathers reciprocate, pinning lovely corsages on their daughter’s fancy party dresses. Then they share tea cakes and other fairy-tale treats as they twirl across the dance floor. If that’s not love, I don’t know what is.

Blight alert

Vandals managed to make a mess of our restrooms at Shepherd Canyon Park. The whole building was covered with “tags” earlier this week — a real eyesore as thousands of motorists drive by each day. With a city maintenance yard right next door, it took Public Works just a few days to clean up this graffiti, though a large mark by the playground is still there.

Punny plate

Seen Feb. 14 on a crimson sedan in the Oakland Hills, the vanity plate IDMND with a picture of a heart at the end. “How appropriate,” writes John D., that the motorist was demanding love — on Valentine’s Day.

YOU CAN TELL a lot about a society by how it treats its seniors. And though I can’t speak firsthand, it seems the golden years are pretty good in the Oakland hills. Here, seniors are involved in everything from gardening groups to line dancing. They teach and take classes, raise money for charity and keep their minds and bodies sharp. The epicenter of active living for hundreds of these older adults is the Ascension Senior Center.

Founded in what is now the Greek Orthodox Cathedral of the Ascension on Lincoln Avenue, the Ascension Senior Center turned 25 this week. The party was wild — something akin to a cabaret with “love, chaos and mayhem,” as the organizers put it. Seniors were dancing and playing live music. There were lively games of canasta and mah-jongg, and a cake five layers high. A fountain of champagne was flowing freely, and folks were toasting their good fortune.

The bad news is, I didn’t find out about this early enough to publicize it. The good news is that this kind of fun and frivolity goes on every Thursday. And it’s free, thanks to the vision of two church women who started the center in 1979.

Becky Voulgares and Destina Bogdanos wanted a place for seniors in the community to share their talents and celebrate life. Ascension had the room, and soon there was funding for an activities coordinator. Despite the ongoing threat of budget cuts today, the center continues to thrive with the help of its director, Julie Jones.

She’s the spark plug for the 125-plus seniors who come to the center each week to take line dancing, tai chi, woodworking and a dozen other classes. The only charge is for lunch — and that’s a whopping $3. All I can say is, I can’t wait to be a “golden oldie” myself.

E-mail bag

Reader Pat Schwinn had this to say about my column on Oakland’s inferiority complex. “I thought I should let you know about an organization I discovered almost a year ago.” She says the group Close to Home was founded by two energetic women who wanted an active, hands-on way for people to learn about our East Bay treasures.

“Over the past year, they have held 10 public lectures at Montclair Presbyterian Church and one at the Oakland Museum,” Pat writes. “Topics have ranged from the history of Mount Diablo to critters of the region and the night sky — all presented by experts who are passionate about their subject.” The next program is set for 8 p.m. Monday, March 8, with naturalist Beverly Ortiz. For more information, visit the Web site http://www.close-to-home.org.

Sign language

What is happening to our motor manners? Roadway rudeness is at an all-time high, according to readers such as Kim R., who says she was almost hit by another woman in Montclair recently. “I was getting ready to turn at a four-way stop at Mountain and La Salle, when a car coming from the opposite direction shot in front of me,” she says. Not only did the motorist jump her turn, she barreled through the intersection with her middle finger extended for all to see.

Door to door

The movie by William H. Macy is a far cry from how people respond to door-to-door salespeople today. I’m hearing ongoing complaints from readers who answer their doorbell to find someone peddling discount restaurant coupons, magazines and other products.

Erin C. says the man at her door was so pushy, the police were called. Another reader says she sent out a neighborhood alert when a man started showing up day after day, selling magazines. She says he has no license or paperwork for door-to-door sales.

Oakland police have a phone number for these kinds of concerns. It’s the non-emergency line: 510-777-3333.

Doggie decay

Thanks to Montclair Veterinary Hospital for letting me know this is National Pet Dental Health Month. I have enough trouble getting my kids to brush, let alone my cat. But luckily, veterinarians can do dog and cat dental cleaning — and even take X-rays of their teeth.

Doctors James Harris (now in Tasmania) and Gary Richter (still in Montclair) say the clinic’s machine can get into a space so small, staff can even do dental exams on birds. So if you hear any squawking when you pass the Montclair Village vet center, you’ll know why.

There’s nothing like a celebrity sighting to get the old blood flowing. Especially if that celebrity rocks the hunk-o-meter like Richard Gere. Yes, he’s been working in our town, Oaktown. And he’s been spending time in Montclair.

Just ask reader Nina Johnson, who spotted the Golden Globe winner in Montclair Park with his wife Carrie, her daughter and their son. “It was a low-key sighting,” Johnson reports.

“Mr. Gere was in jeans, leather jacket and a baseball cap. Carrie was in jeans and a tee shirt. He was heard talking on his cell phone (we can only speculate with what important person) and later seen pushing his son on the swings.”

Johnson says Gere was so “under the radar” that no one approached him and most of the nearby moms missed him completely.

Turns out Gere is filming “Bee Season,” adapted from the Pulitzer Prize winning novel by Myla Goldberg, originally set in Philadelphia. His “base camp” has been the Greek Orthodox Cathedral of the Ascension on Lincoln Avenue. Filming may take place at Piedmont High School next week.

If you’ve ever wanted to be in the movies, this could be your chance. Just throw on something flashy and try to worm your way into a scene.

E-mail bag

Speaking of limelight, local Realtor Keith Sjööholm had this reaction to my article on seeing Oakland through the eyes of a travel writer: “You are right that Oakland should be written up in travel sections & magazines.”

He adds that there’s a good article in last April’s edition of Travel and Leisure by Anya Von Bremzen called “The Other City by the Bay.” In it, she describes the culinary treats in our town, from the farmer’s markets to the Dim Sum in Chinatown. And, of course, the day ends with a gondola ride on Lake Merritt.

Good seeds

Thank goodness for the green thumbs at the Hillside Garden Club. You may not realize it, but this group has buds and blooms springing up all over our neighborhoods.

Not only do they keep the Montclair Library and the Joaquin Miller Community Center grounds beautiful, they have something called horticultural therapy for seniors. Once a month volunteers go to the Water’s Edge Nursing Home in Alameda to help the residents make flower arrangements.

Reader Irene Olson says this is a bright spot in the day of these patients and the club has received a regional award for their efforts. If you’d like to help the Garden Club “grow,” call Paula Stetler at 510-339-8720.

The group is hosting a talk on carnivorous plants at 12:30 p.m. Feb. 24 in the Joaquin Miller Community Center, 3594 Sanborn Drive.

Music scene

A hip new CD has hit the East Bay music scene. It’s the first release for the group Implied Five, made up of three Oakland musicians and a fourth from Berkeley. Therese “TC” Brewitz pulls off a triple threat for the band, playing keyboards, bass and pulling down the lead vocals.

But alternative rock isn’t the only thing in this young woman’s repertoire. She’s a ballet teacher and does Pilates and yoga on the side. Along with bandmates Mike Sprague, Dave Cherry and Chuck Butler, this is the best local band to emerge in a while. Find them on the Web at http://www.impliedfive.com.

Karaoke, anyone?

Just when you thought it was safe to go into the piano bar again, karaoke has made a comeback in Berkeley. Justice Baxter (of Wheels of Justice in Montclair) admits he’s a karaoke crooner at the Shattuck Down Low Lounge. The bar, in the basement of the popular Indian restaurant Pasand, has open mike competitions on Tuesday nights. They even post their song list on the Internet at http://www.berkeleykaraoke.net.

(Baxter and company plan a little karaoke of their own to celebrate the bike shop’s move from “down under” the Bank of America building to the former Parasol shop in central Montclair Village on the evening of Feb. 28.)

Trail talk

Beware of brown twigs carrying itchy oils. Reader Lois A. says just because you can’t see the telltale leaves, doesn’t mean the poison oak’s not potent this time of year. And you don’t have to touch it yourself to get the red rash. She thinks her cat brought it home in his fur coat.

WHEN IT COMES to television, I’m not a big fan. Most of what I see on TV makes me want to spit and rinse. But somehow, inexplicably, I’ve been invited to two boob tube extravaganzas recently. One was for the Super Bowl — the mother of all TV days. The other is a Sopranos season opener at the hills home of Big Rick Stuart and Audio Vidya. Yes, these are radio DJs (Rick is on KFOG and Vidya is a Live 105 alum), but they’re also HBO junkies, and they’ve turned me into one, too.

Still, I’m not so hooked on a TV show that I watch it with the neighbors — clad only in pajamas. This is how far things have gone on Trestle Glen. And, coincidentally, it’s more radio people.

Katie O’Shea (KGO Traffic) and Dianne Nicolini (mid-days on KDFC) are part of a group that meets every Tuesday night at 9 p.m. to watch “24.” “At three minutes to 9, we all arrive, and there’s really no talking until the commercials,” says O’Shea, who adds that the host of the week shares a little wine and a treat or two.

And why the pajamas? Because radio folks don’t worry about what they wear. They’re never seen!

Speaking of TV

Have you heard of the new reality TV show where mothers swap families? Reader Heather Marchman says there’s a casting call right now for this new show, which doesn’t have a name yet. But out of the 41 reality shows that are currently in the works, this one sounds the most interesting. After all, what mother hasn’t had this fantasy — at least for a moment?

Have a heart

Chuck Harrison, a big force behind the new large mailbox at Mountain and Colton, is healing after a double bypass on Jan. 29, according to his wife, Cathy Harrison. Chuck felt an odd pain in his chest. Fortunately, he had it checked out. It was caused by blockage due to calcification.

Doctors at Summit Medical Center debated the right course of action — at a public conference forum going on while Chuck’s health plans were being formulated. Now, as a “model patient,” he’s become the hospital’s hero.

E-mail bag

My recent column item on what travel writers see in our town triggered this e-mail from Troy Christmas: “I just read your column and I couldn’t agree more about the need to trumpet Oakland.” Troy runs a community resource Web site — weloveoakland.com — and says he’s adding Oakland-centric e-cards and a local scholarship board soon.

If you have any other ideas on how to promote Oakland, contact Troy through his Web site.

Back in time

The 21st century has barely begun, and already I want to go back. Back to a time when entertainment meant music, dancing, laughter and jokes. Back to a big band dance on the USS Hornet.

On New Year’s Eve, I watched in amazement as couples boarded the ship in World War II clothing. They danced the Lindy and the Jitterbug with reckless abandon, flying across the floor while the orchestra played.

Word has it that spirits haunt the Hornet — the ghosts of sailors who died on the ship. But if there are phantoms, they’re friendly, and love a good party as much as the rest of us. Log on to http://www.uss-hornet.org to fine out more about the next big dance on the ship that’s called “The Gray Ghost.”

Punny plates

John S. spotted this on a colossal vehicle in Piedmont: the vanity plates “Whtwail.”

And Cynthia T. passes this along from her commute down Park Boulevard: the plate “75swngr” on a vintage sedan with a bobbing hula girl in the back window.

IN KEEPING with the light, fluffy nature of my column, I almost never get political. There are plenty of columnists who want to dip their pen into that inkwell, and I’m happy to let them. But as the Town Crier, I feel it’s my duty to report unrest in the Village — so here goes.

Pulling up to the Montclair Library last Saturday, I got burned again. The sign in the window read “closed,” and I should have known better. It wasn’t the first time I’d brought my kids there to check out books on a Saturday. I looked around for some way to vent and spotted an orange flier on the book receptacle. It read: “Our library, which we support with our city taxes, has to be open on Saturdays for many of us to be able to use it!”

The unknown author railed against the closure, saying it was decided with “no notice, no public meetings, nothing in the newspaper.” I felt my blood pressure rise. The flier went on to say, “The library absolutely has to serve working adults. It is not here to offer free day care to students!”

A light bulb went off in my head, recalling what a woman there had told me months earlier. She compared the library to an after-school day-care center, where students with working parents could do homework and socialize. Closing on Saturdays allowed the Montclair Library to open on Mondays — for the after-school crowd.

Now, it’s only fair that I give you the other side. Oakland Library director Carmen Martinez lives in Montclair. She’s aware of the fliers and is getting calls and e-mails about the decision. She says she did what she had to do in the wake of the city’s big budget cut. “We laid off a significant number (22) of part-time staff,” she says, adding that library officials were critical when it came to covering weekend branch schedules.

And the day-care issue? “Your remarks about the ‘brisk child-care service’ are not accurate,” Martinez says. All of the branch libraries experience an influx of children after school, she insists. She also says the library does not provide child-care service; it is simply a technology and resource center for students who have homework.

All of this could be a moot point if the Measure Q parcel tax passes in March. Martinez says the extra money would be put toward extending hours to six days a week at every branch, as well as adding books and programs.

“In the meantime, unfortunately, we will remain closed on Saturdays in Montclair,” she says. But if Measure Q fails, Martinez promises she’ll have a community forum to get public input on the library hours. Any feedback can go to her at cmartinez@oaklandnet.com.

Speaking of voting

How does a $3 Bay Bridge toll sound to you? In just a few weeks, we’ll be voting on Regional Measure 2, which asks us to raise our state bridge tolls by a buck.

My friends at baycrossings.com remind us that we reap what we sow. “It means facing up to the disastrous consequences of ripping out the coordinated rail and ferry network that so ably served the Bay Area into the 1950s.”

Trumpeting Oakland

Ever wonder what travel journalists who’ve seen the world write about Oakland? Here’s what the Oakland Convention and Visitor’s Bureau said recently to lure journalists to “the sunny side of San Francisco Bay.”

In a broadcast e-mail, the organization wrote: “You’ll experience the food and flavor of the city’s colorful, multicultural neighborhoods and historic districts. Take an enchanting gondola ride around scenic Lake Merritt or perhaps kayak on San Francisco Bay. Explore the mysteries of Oakland’s Chinatown. And groove to world-class jazz or blues set in the restored waterfront district at Jack London Square.”

Reading this reminded me that Oakland has some great attractions. It would be nice to read about the good things we have to offer — if not on the front page, then at least in the travel section.