MY SON GETS his driver’s license soon and I’m worried. It’s not that I don’t trust him — he’s played enough video games to have the hand-eye coordination of a karate grandmaster. It’s not even the other drivers on the road who scare me. It’s the bikers.

The other day, a bicyclist was speeding along a fog-drenched section of Grizzly Peak Road when he lost control on a curve. My husband and daughter were coming along at that moment as he slid into their lane and bounced off the back bumper of their truck. Luckily, the rider only had road rash — but what if he had been seriously injured or killed? Blame aside, it would have been traumatic for both families.

We live in a beautiful place where bikes are as numerous as cars on some scenic byways. All it takes is one miscalculation to cause an accident. An accident that will forever change the lives of both parties involved.

PROUD MOMENT: Congratulations to two local ladies for earning the highest honor in Girl Scouting. Sophia Moradian and Lauren Harano, both 18, have accomplished something that only one-tenth of 1 percent of girls who start out as Brownies ever achieve — the Gold Award. It didn’t come easy. The girls put 60 hours each into their community service project, sprucing up a Peter Pan pre-school in Oakland .

WILD RIDE: Most people celebrate their birthday with a cake — and maybe a party. But local senior Bob Frick is marking 71 years on the planet with a bike ride across America. He leaves Aug. 7 on a two-month trek from San Diego to St. Augustine, riding up to 60 miles a day.

My wife will be driving behind with supplies in the Prius,” he says, adding they’ve done several long distance bike rides and hikes together. But this trek isn’t just for fun. Frick hopes to raise $71,000 for East Bay Habitat for Humanity and is taking donations on his Web site at http://www.fricks.firstgiving.com/cycleofhope.

E-MAIL BAG: An anonymous reader is fed up with the city’s lack of response in cutting back brush on its own property at Skyline and Kimberlin Heights.

“The weeds are damaging the streets,” he writes. “Plus, you have rebar coming out of the ground at the bus stop. Somebody is going to get impaled.” The reader says repeated calls to the Fire Abatement District have yet to get the job done.

MORE MAIL: The bad smell I mentioned a few weeks ago at Moraga and Medau has reader Bonnie Candell wondering if it’s coming from the nearby storm drain.

“I’ve spoken to some bus drivers about it who agree it’s awful,” she writes, but says she’s gotten no response to her e-mail to Public Works regarding the matter. Where is it coming from? Not even her nose knows.

FREEBIE ALERT: Some people pay hundreds of dollars to belong to a health club. Reader Marcia Sugrow works out for free at the Montclair Recreation Center. She says you can too, if you’re 50 or older. Instructor Ellen Green teaches a free aerobics class at 8 a.m. Mondays and Wednesdays. Reaching the half-century mark has its rewards!

YOU’VE HEARD OF life in the fast lane? Well, I’m trying life in the slow lane, as I look for ways to cut the high cost of gas. My inspiration comes from friend Rosie Nysaether (a Realtor for Alain Pinel in Montclair ) who says we can save 54 cents a gallon if we drive 60 mph instead of 70 mph. She picked up the tip from the Sierra Club and passed it along in her newsletter last month.

There is one problem with this theory. I’m afraid I’ll get mowed over as I turtle along on the freeway. Even in the slow lane, I’m getting “the look,” the horn — even the freeway salute. Is it worth the scorn to save $6 a tank? Calculated over time — the answer is obvious. A savings of $300 or more a year can buy a lot of lattes. Better to have the liquid go in my tank, then in that of my car.

SHOPPING ALERT: Here’s food for thought: You may want to avoid peak shopping times at the Montclair Safeway this summer. The upper lot is closed during the market’s conversion to a lifestyle store and parking is at a premium down below. That means no leaving your car in the lot while you run other errands. It just isn’t right. On the flip side, the store will have a new look, come fall, including a soup bar and other gourmet goodies.

E-MAIL BAG: The new head of the Montclair Village Association is responding to an e-mail I ran, recently, about the challenge of parking without meters to mark the spaces. Roger Vickery says with the help of Wlad Wlassowsky from the city’s Public Works Agency, he’s had all the parking spaces painted with “t’s” so motorists will know where to put their cars.

Speaking of parking, reader Mary G. (who doesn’t want her last name printed) has a bone of her own to pick.

“The ‘peeps’ that double park in front of SCORE every night between 5 and 6,” she writes, “are just idling their cars and wasting gas — waiting for their kids.”

She says one evening she even saw someone get out of their car, lock it, and leave it running in the middle of the street for a full 20 minutes. Starbucks, she observes, is another hot spot for rude drivers.

FUNGUS AMONGUS: There’s trouble in storybook land. The old Montclair Library has a mold problem that will need to be addressed sometime soon. The culprit was probably a leaky roof, which has since been replaced, but allowed water in the walls behind hundreds of books. Look for a fix this fall that includes tearing out the custom-made book shelves to get at the problem.

ANIMAL TALES: Just when you thought there were plenty of animals at the Oakland Zoo, hundreds of goats are living just outside the gates, “mowing” the brush during fire season. The four-legged weed wackers seem oblivious to the fact that they’re dining near their wild brethren. I even saw a bird sitting on the back of one goat while he was munching away the other day.

“Necessity is the mother of invention.” Could Plato have foreseen our high energy costs when he penned this phrase?

Montclair homeowner John Orfali has taken this philosophy and has run with it, inventing a quick, easy way to make renewable energy for his home.

It involves a windmill and solar panel connected to a battery, which he and his sons have installed on their property.

“We run our TV and bedroom lights off it at night,” said his wife, Mary, who claimed it could also come in handy during a power outage. “If there is a major earthquake and we are without electricity for days, how are you going to charge your cell phone or run some lights?”

John’s invention offers a solution, and with any luck he’ll find the financial backing to go public soon.

CHANGE METERS: Want to put your money where your mouth is? Top Dog in Rockridge is selling hot dogs for two-bits to anyone who pays with a quarter from 1964 or earlier. Why? The older quarters have silver — enough silver to make them worth about 3 bucks today — or the price of a hot dog. There’s a deeper political message about the government minting worthless money, these days, but you’ll have to go to the sausage shop to get that “food for thought.”

NATURE RETREAT: Speaking of sausage, there’ll be plenty of brats at the Aug. 3 Biergartenfest at Nature Friends. This German retreat is like a Bavarian Village overlooking Butters Canyon in the hills. There’s a beer garden, kitchen and dance hall on the wooded property, which is open several times a year for folk dancing and festivals. The late summer event will feature a live band from 2-6 p.m. and the Nature Friends Schuhplattler Dance Group. Call 510-531-2930 for more information.

MAIL BAG: The Town Crier continues to get complaints about Oakland ‘s new parking meters. Reader Maleah Simpson says there’s no consideration for our aging population.

“Walking, in some instances, half a block to print out a ticket, return to the car, walk the same half block up hill to the shop they want to visit — it may be difficult for some,” she said.

She also points out that the city is losing money because people are taking up more than one space.

“There is no guideline,” Simpson said.

E-MAIL BAG: Thanks to reader Tod Vedock for alerting me to his year-long crusade to fix a buckled section of roadway along Broadway Terrace. He said the roots of a large tree have pushed the pavement up there, creating a nasty hazard for bicyclists and an eyesore for everyone else.

“I thought I would get this corrected,” he wrote, “as I’m sure you are bouncing all over it on your scooter!”

And in response to my recent piece on the renovation of Royal Ground, Eric Reynolds wrote that Raquel Saldana has left the coffee shop after 13 years.

“She’s been there almost everyday, from the crack of dawn until the late afternoon,” he said. “She’s loved by many of the Village moms because she kisses and hugs their babies and she’s not afraid to say hello to anyone.”

Saldana hasn’t gone far, however. She’s reportedly moved across the street, serving coffee at the Malt Shop.

JUST CALL ME the bird whisperer. A sparrow landed on the seat of my scooter the other day, just as I was parking in the Lucky lot.

He had two little tufts of fur and an odd look in his eyes as he bobbed up and down, giving me the once over. I asked him how spring was treating him and he gave me a peep. Then he awkwardly flapped his wings and flew into the side of a window.

“It must be a baby, just out of the nest,” said the receptionist at the nearby Montclair Veterinary Hospital. She scooped him up and put him on the ledge near his parents, who were obviously peeved that he’d left home without permission. But for that one fleeting moment, we had bonded; I with my scooter and bird with his new set of wings.

CRIME LOG: It’s a well-known fact that banks don’t like publicity when they are robbed. They don’t want to be seen as vulnerable. So I won’t mention the name of the bank in Montclair that was robbed, recently, by gun-wielding thugs who reportedly assaulted both the security guard and a teller. They got away but were later caught after another East Bay heist in which the bank had put a tracking device in the money. It’s just another example of how violent crime has escalated in Oakland.

E-MAIL BAG: Reader Michael Levy wants to know if the rumors about Royal Ground are true.

“I’ve heard it’s becoming a café,” he writes, adding the word is they’ll close for renovations soon. Michael, you’re right. Royal Ground’s new owner, Miguel Barron, confirms he’s putting in a kitchen, and will start serving food soon. He hopes the work won’t cause too much disruption to the coffee shop, where a multitude of Montclair residents get their daily caffeine fix. As I’ve reported before, Barron already has one restaurant in the village — the venerable Montclair Egg Shop.

MORE E-MAIL: Several readers have asked for an update on the median strip planting along Highway 13. Councilwoman Jean Quan says Caltrans is working on it — albeit slowly.

“They are incredibly slow but have worked fairly consistently since January,” she writes, saying they’ve installed the irrigation and have been hauling in soil to begin the planting.

PEDDLING FUN: Speaking of Royal Ground, the bike club that calls “the ground” home is celebrating its 10th anniversary on Sunday.

Ron Scrivani, Howard Neal and the Velo Raptors have been “peddling” the benefits of bicycle fitness and now have upwards of 65 people in their group.

“Our club started 10 years ago when Howard Neal said that he was going to take a bike ride on the coming Saturday morning, and I asked if I could join him,” Scrivani said. It’s turned into a weekly Sunday morning (8:15 a.m.) ride that starts at Royal Ground and goes through the hills and beyond. Everyone is welcome.

PAMPER PARTY: Strong hands and a warm heart. That’s a good way to describe the staff at Montclair’s Simply Gorgeous Day Spa. They are spending the day, today, giving free treatments to five winners of their recent “You deserve to be pampered” contest. Nominated by friends and family, one recipient was described in this way: “She is ‘mom’ to 2 smart, witty & handsome boys. She works her butt off as a gardener 7 days a week. Her joints are aching, her hands are painful & basically all her joints throb day & night, but still she works, cooks dinner, helps with homework and keeps her home impeccable.”

Hands down — this woman deserves a massage!

I LOVE CHATTING over coffee. It’s not the caffeine I crave as much as the conversation. So I was really excited to match wits, last week, with fellow news junkie Joe Tuman. Joe lives in Oakland and is an expert on campaign rhetoric, often appearing on network news shows. I couldn’t wait for his take on Obama and Hillary.

“Barring another eruption, (i.e. a major gaff) I’ve done the math,” he says, and “Clinton can’t make up the delegate count.” Even a fight on the convention floor won’t be enough to save Hillary, he feels. That leaves Obama and McCain for the presidency and Tuman likes Obama’s chances. “I look at McCain and think Bob Dole,” he says, adding age will be McCain’s unspoken Achilles’ heel.

But what about the rhetoric? What kind of guy makes a living studying that? Tuman says it goes back to childhood, when he saw John F. Kennedy give a campaign speech in his hometown of Turlock.

“I saw how rhetoric gets crafted for a particular audience,” he says, remembering how Kennedy used turkey references to warm up the crowd of Nixon supporters in a town where the primary industry was poultry.

But enough about politics. Tuman can talk about other things. He’s an avid runner and a coach for a group that runs, just for fun, every Thursday morning. The fact that they meet at 6 a.m. shouldn’t deter you. If you want to join his group, just show up at the Piedmont High track. Oh — and if you want more rhetoric, get his new book “Political Communication in American Campaigns” from Sage Press — available in bookstores everywhere.SHOWING GRATUTUDE: It’s refreshing to uncover acts of patriotism and kindness in this day and age. That’s why I’m giving Julie Orman at Piedmont Network Chiropractic a plug. A Montclair resident, Dr. Orman is offering free chiropractic care to Iraq War veterans who come home with post traumatic stress.

“There is no popping,” she explains, “but rather a spreading of ease throughout the body as the way of healing.”

It sounds good to me and should be a welcome relief for the anxious young vets returning from war.

AROUND TOWN: Talk about a rebirth! Just months after J&J Hardware disappeared into the night, literally — the empty Montclair space has been transformed into a cool, new nail salon.

“We do nails differently,” owner Uyen Nguyen laughs, drawing a parallel between hardware nails and the kind with which she works. I had a “mani-pedi” the other day and fell in love with the new salon that Nguyen named after her daughter, Isabella. She gutted the space and redesigned it in a breezy blue nautical theme that reminds her of going to the beach in her native Vietnam. More important, this place is immaculate. Tools are sterilized in an autoclave, buffs and pads are disposable and the footbaths use the latest anti-fungal technology. The salon has a fun side, too. You can sit at the bar and have tea, watch TV or even have a glass of champagne (BYOB and over 21, of course) while you get your fingernails done. If you ask me, Isabella is a great addition to the neighborhood.

CLUTTER BUSTER: Springtime is garage sale time and Joaquin Miller Elementary School has one of the biggest with its annual yard sale on May 3. But who has the time to go through all their closets and storage for donations? Instead of a chore, Nina Johnson suggests you look at this as an opportunity to lighten your load. Her business, Simply Organized, is working with Joaquin Miller supporters to clean out their clutter in kitchens, garages and other areas. The school gets cool treasures and homeowners get more space. It’s a match made in heaven.

MAYDAY! MAYDAY! It’s known internationally as the call for help. In our house, it’s also a deadline. May 1 is the date that our college-bound daughter must decide on a school. Her whole future depends on it, of course, and perhaps the future of the entire planet.

At least that’s how it seems. Paralyzed with indecision, the e-mails and letters keep coming — from not one, but 10 different universities. They all want to welcome my daughter to her new home.

“I may have applied to too many schools,” she revealed recently. “I have too many choices.” It may have been my fault, too, for encouraging her to apply to some of my own personal favorites.

Take Montana State University, for instance. My old alma mater has generously offered a package of cowboys, skiing and scholarships. But the one thing they can’t promise is a buffer between my daughter and her mother’s “weird college friends.” Bozeman is, after all, a small town.

Then there’s Fordham. My daughter can’t remember why she applied here, but it’s New York so it’s in the running.

The University of Pittsburgh wasn’t her idea either, but she does have a favorite uncle there. However this must be weighed with the fact that her feet would freeze in flip-flops.

The University of Hawaii has the promise of paradise with sunshine and surfers, but can she come home when she wants to? There’s also the prospect of finding geckos on her dorm room walls. In other words, the eeewwww factor.

UC Santa Barbara, on the other hand, may be too close to home. Still, there’s sunshine and the beach and, as Bob Barker used to say, “the price is right”.

That leaves, in no particular order, my daughter’s current “fav five”: USC, Tulane, University of Texas, University of Georgia and Arizona State. If all things were equal, (i.e. cost, class size, career opportunities) Georgia would probably win the competition for my brilliant child. She’s dreamed about Georgia since she took a Girl Scout visit there years ago.

But the University of Texas has Austin and its renowned music scene. It’s also been rated the safest campus in the country.

It’s tough, too, to turn down Tulane. It’s a super school that exudes southern charm and is generous with its scholarships. Ditto for Arizona State, which mapped out its financial aid package months ago, making it seem almost painless to pay for college.

Finally, there’s USC — my dream school. I emphasize my because this was the university I wanted to attend back in high school. In those days, parents had parameters and mine was in miles. I had to stay within 1,000 miles of my home in Minnesota. Montana State turned out to be great, but I always wondered what life would have been like as a Trojan. Would my connections have catapulted me to someday be president of NBC? Would I have married a movie mogul or, even better, been one myself? That’s not to say that I’m unhappy today. My life is rich, if not my bank account.

In the end, it’s not about me anyway — as my daughter reminds me. This is her college experience. Thank goodness. If I had to decide, I’d be a wreck. Or maybe I’d send out a “Mayday” and hope someone would come to my aid.

I’ve lived in Oakland since 1988 but never really knew downtown until last fall. Taking a job at 19th and Franklin opened my eyes to the city’s renaissance — and I’m excited.

My husband and I went to the hip new Levende East in Old Oakland the other night. Montclair restaurateur Ben Doran opened this place a few months ago at 827 Washington St. and it oozes cool, with an eclectic crowd of hipsters and after-work professionals chatting it up as they sip specialty cocktails.

Doran calls his food world fusion and the menu reflects this vision. We thoroughly enjoyed dunking our bread in the Peruvian dipping sauce; tasting each offering on the exquisite Italian cheese plate and sharing a savory side of mac n’ cheese with smoked apple wood bacon.

I kept thinking to myself “this place is so hip.” Even the bar looks like a piece of art with each bottle of liquor bathed in soft light. It turns out Doran’s partner, another Oaklander, did the design. Kiri Eschelle spent months studying the space and did a great job of making it seem open and airy and at the same time, welcoming.

Of course, the location is just one of the reasons Levende East is so popular. Chef Arren Caccamo is another. His food (he also cooks for the partner’s other restaurant, Levende in San Francisco) is masterfully prepared and really, you can’t go wrong with anything on the menu. Doran does a great job, too, of picking the wine, with more than 20 selections by the glass. And the cocktails, I’m told, are “to die for,” with names like Pear Bliss (pear infused vodka, pear liquor, amaretto and a cinnamon sugar rim) and Pink Amour (brandied cherries, Plymouth gin and St. Germain Elderflower liqueur).

Levende East is one of the catalysts for change in downtown Oakland. It’s revitalizing the city’s nightlife and helping to brighten the image of our town. I, for one, plan on dining there — a lot.

WORKING TOGETHER: Neighbors in North Oakland call it their “field of dreams.” It’s the new baseball field they built with hard work and almost $300,000 in donations from the community.

“It’s still a diamond in the rough,” says Oakland Tech varsity baseball coach Eric Clayton, using a clever metaphor. “But it’s a jewel compared to what we’re used to,” and his team looks forward to playing it home games on the field at 45th and Telegraph.

As a sidebar, Oakland’s urban neighborhoods have produced some of history’s greatest ballplayers, including Joe Morgan, Frank Robinson, Dave Stewart and Rickey Henderson.

E-MAIL BAG: Readers are talkin’ turkey again. An e-mail from Piedmont’s Anne Nunno says a brazen bird all but challenged her cat the other day, strutting toward kitty on Sunnyhills Road.

“My cat puffed up to three times her size with bottlebrush tail,” writes Nunno, who thought the turkey actually looked quite elegant. Minutes later it flew up to the roof of a neighbor’s house to take in the view, leaving pussy below to regain her composure.

On another topic “… reader Adelaide Rule has a suggestion for making Oakland a more energy-efficient city. She suggests tweaking the traffic lights to move cars more smoothly through intersections.

“I live off Mandana, and going down towards Lakeshore, and then on Lakeshore, Lake Park and onto the freeway, one cannot make a single light,” she vents.

Rule says rather than spend the money for an unwanted stop light in Montclair, it should be used to hire a decent traffic engineer to “band” the city’s existing traffic lights.

LOCAL CELEBRITY: Actor Clyde Bruff (“The Commander”) has just finished filming “Milk,” the story of the assassination of San Francisco Supervisor Harvey Milk. He says working on the movie was “a real trip.”

“Lead Sean Penn as Harvey Milk is phenomenal throughout,” he writes, but the highlight was getting to exchange barbs with director Oliver Stone. Bruff, who lives in Montclair, is a member of the Screen Actor’s Guild with a resume as long as my arm. He’s played everything from a boxer to a bowler and does dozens of character voices. But I’m sure he’d tell you his real claim to fame was having his photo next to mine at the old Montclair Malt Shop.

IT’S EASTER WEEK — and I’m feeling nostalgic. Who will help me dye the eggs this year? It wasn’t long ago that my children loved this springtime ritual. We would bring the dye down to the swim club, and dip eggs that were two-toned, spotted, mottled and monogrammed. We’d dry them in their little paper egg cups and take them home to serve as the centerpiece for the Easter feast.

Now my kids are teenagers, and dying eggs doesn’t have the same appeal. Oh, they’ll dip one between phone calls or incoming text messages, or in those fleeting moments between sports practice and homework assignments. But to quote an old B.B. King song … “The thrill is gone”. At least until the grandchildren come along.

ABOUT TOWN: Speaking of green, the home décor store Make My Day is selling earth friendly handmade journals at their Piedmont Avenue shop. It’s more than just an environmental statement. The owners hope to set an example for kindness in the community, by donating half the profits to the Oakland Firefighter’s Random Acts charity.

Meanwhile, its anniversary time for a neighborhood institution in the Dimond/Laurel District. World Ground has been serving up coffee, pastries and sandwiches at 3726 MacArthur Boulevard for a decade. A party April 5 will feature daytime fun for the kids and evening wine-tasting for adults.

E-MAIL BAG: Montclair motorists are on the mind of reader Jackie Thompson, who says she witnessed an appalling display of road rage the other day. Two drivers were vying for the same parking space at Mountain near La Salle when an angry exchange ensued, followed by the thrust of a middle digit from the younger motorist. “B- ” she screamed at the other driver as she drove off in a huff. One can only wonder how the proposed stop light at that corner would have added to the colorful moment.

On another matter, reader Lin Barron says a huge Rite-Aid diesel truck regularly blocks traffic in the late afternoons on Mountain Boulevard . He says he’s complained both to police and store management, but the deliveries continue and so does the gridlock, as the big rig stops to unload in the middle of the street.

DREAM KITCHEN: What woman doesn’t dream of the perfect kitchen? For Montclair’s Linda Yemoto, that dream is coming true, this week, thanks to HGTV (Home and Garden Television). Yemoto applied online for the show’s kitchen make-over and got the call when she was shopping one day.

“I was shocked!” she says, after giving up on the possibility of hearing from them. Apparently she got in the back door, so to speak, because the show only remakes a couple of kitchens a year and one of their candidates had backed out.

“You do have to sign a contract and put down money,” she says, adding it’s something like $4,000 plus the cost of any upgrades and new appliances. Because Yemoto is a naturalist for the East Bay Regional Parks, her upgrades are green. She’s using Vetrazzo recycled glass countertops, (a company out of Richmond ) and recycled cork floors. The show is shooting her kitchen segment this week with an air date to be determined. It just goes to show – we should never stop dreaming.

IT’S TURKEY TIME again. Isn’t it funny how these birds come out to play, just as our attention turns to holiday meats like corned beef (St. Pattys Day) and ham (Easter)? And the way they strut their stuff so bodaciously — without regard to people or predators. It’s as if they’re flaunting their feathers in front of us – just because they can.

Maria Ku had a pack of wild turkeys land on her neighbor’s roof the other day.

“The birds seemed very agitated (happy?) and immediately walked up and down the slanted roof to the next roof and the next, then came down on the driveway and walked further to the green lawn area by the houses,” she reports. There were 14 turkeys, following their leader like little soldiers. At least they weren’t goose stepping.

Meanwhile, reader Laura Thomas says she’s also spotted several flocks of the comical creatures, including two that were strutting down Piedmont Avenue outside BlockBuster Video. A woman was reportedly trying to “herd” them out of the line of traffic toward a little park and creek on Vista. A modern day shepherd, of sorts.

AROUND TOWN: After months on the market, Montclair’s Royal Ground Coffee House has a new owner. It’s the same guy who owns the Montclair Egg Shop — Miguel Barron. Talk about a full plate — Barron just opened the Egg Shop for dinner – the first time an evening meal has been served at the venerable breakfast place since the mid-1980s. Where he’ll find the time to run Royal Ground is anyone’s guess — but then, he’s a young guy with a lot of talent and drive.

CRIME UPDATE: Just days after a fatal hit-and-run in the hills last week, neighbors on Manzanita Drive are talking about an explosive early morning car fire in the parking lot of The Hills Swim and Tennis Club. Police say someone stole a hummer in Fairfield and set it on fire in the Oakland hills, possibly for the insurance money. The burned-out hulk of metal sat ominously in the early morning hours, hardly noticed by the bleary-eyed members who were arriving to exercise.

GREAT NIGHT: The “beautiful people” seem to have a standing date at the Oakland Museum for its monthly First Friday events. The most eclectic and best dressed group I’ve seen in awhile finds the museum a great place to groove with live music, libations, and after hours access to the museum — all for the price of admission. Go in March and you’ll catch the 100th anniversary exhibit of Oakland’s California College of the Arts. It’s a timeline of social influence over the last century, with more than 120 pieces of fascinating (and occasionally eye-popping) student art. It’s especially interesting if you’ve had a cocktail or two at the party first.

MAIL BAG: The Town Crier doesn’t get much snail mail these days, considering the cost of postage. But a concerned reader writes: “please mention in your column for people to pick up their pet p—.” She says enough trouble navigating the uneven sidewalks in Montclair, without having these unwanted dog droppings to boot. Even fellow columnist Dave Newhouse mentioned the problem recently. Come on, dog owners — start scooping what’s yours.

FREEBIE ALERT: Everyone loves something for nothing. That’s why I’m promoting the free plant exchange at 3811 Lakeshore Ave. on Saturday, March 29. Bring your roots and shoots, plants and prunings, to the “grassroots” event from 1-4 pm and swap them for greens you actually want. There’ll be garden accessories, too — even pots and pond fish. For more information, call 510-866-8482.

WELCOME to “President’s Weekend;” the mother of all ski holidays. And while everyone loves a parade, the steady march of traffic to Tahoe this Friday is a spectacle to avoid. Better to cozy up with a hot cup of tea and the Town Crier.

STREET CRIME: The latest “quality of life” crime involves the theft of catalytic converters. Cars parked on dark hills streets are easy pickings for thieves who slip under the vehicles and make two clean cuts through the tailpipe. The bounty they’re after is the platinum, which runs as high as $1,000 an ounce. Sounds like a lot of cash until you realize it takes between 50 and 100 converters to get an ounce of the precious metal. But to car owners, the cost is even higher, since the price tag for a converter is up to $1,500.

E-MAIL BAG: Speaking of crimes, thanks to reader Pat Schwinn for alerting me to a phone scam that’s been catching folks unawares. If you ever get a call from someone claiming to be a jury coordinator following up on a summons, don’t buy it. They are bullying people into giving personal information that can later be used for identity theft. Learn more about the scam and how to protect yourself by going on the fbi.gov web-site and typing in “jury scams”.

AUTHOR, AUTHOR: Hills resident Laura McAmis has just published a tribute book to her late father, Jack Newcombe. Reader Yvonne Byron says Newcombe was a well-known writer, and his daughter included hundreds of letters he wrote to his wife (Laura’s mother) during World War II as a basis for Foxhole Dreams. “Although only in his early twenties,” says Byron, “he tried to humanize the horror of war by befriending German children and writing about the foibles of his fellow soldiers.” Byron says McAmis and her husband did extensive research for the book, which they published themselves with an easy on-line software program.

FOND FAREWELL: Readers have mentioned the passing of longtime hills resident Bea Isbell. At 86, she died leaving her mark on Montclair , as a seamstress, artist, master gardener and more. Isbell was a mentor to young people, who wanted to learn the craft of sewing. She made everything from ball gowns to Halloween costumes and her talent and generosity will be missed.

ANIMAL INSTINCTS: Call yourself an animal lover? Then consider the warm, fuzzy feeling you’ll get at tonight’s valentine’s fundraiser for Friends of the Oakland Animal Shelter. With drinks, desserts, dancing and animal games – it should be a wild evening at the First Unitarian Church in Oakland . See the Web site http://www.oaklandsanimals.wordpress.com for more information